hobo.pajama.party

2009-08-11T07:12:00.001-07:00

i think this blog is done forever. bye!

hobo pajama party was a cool name though..kudos me.

hey

2009-01-10T23:13:00.000-08:00

Resolutions

2009-01-01T13:45:00.000-08:00

Most of the time, New Year's resolutions are really all the same old plans of quitting, losing, learning, making things that all fall through in the end. This year, I tried to be more thoughtful about how my life has changed in the past year, and what changes I want to see in the coming year. I think these are all both feasible and actually important for me, in order for my soul to grow.

1) Surround myself with people who inspire me. I love my friends at school, but not all of them really push me or challenge me in any significant way. I think I'm realizing more and more how your social networks have a noticeable impact on every aspect of your personality - from your politics to your eating habits to your fashion sense - even if it's on a purely subconscious level. Given that, I want to make sure that I'm shaped into the person that I want to be anyway (if that makes any sense). Even if it's hard to find the right people in the school and city I'm in, I just need to spend more time thinking, WWTPIAD -- What Would That Person I Admire Do?

2) Take myself seriously. Nobody really cares about what you almost did or are thinking about doing. What's really important is what you DO. A lot of my lack of action in the past has to do, very simply, with laziness. So: I need to not fuck up my sleeping schedule for stupid reasons. I need to eat well, exercise, and take care of my body. And I need to take care of the rest of me by write write write write writing. I have all the tools I need to do all these things, so I only need to not squander it all through laziness, idiotic excuses, and poor decision-making. Not that difficult, really.

3) Do what I want. This past semester was just a dark, dismal time. Taken over by a crisis of purpose, I added an economics major and started taking all these courses that I didn't give a shit about, that didn't really get me going intellectually, and that drained away all of my time and energy. I stopped going to my job at Gerontology because I think I just got really weary of having to do the same quantitative data analysis bullshit over and over and over and over and over again. I need re-evaluate my daily activities and make sure that every hour of every day is spent doing something that is good for me, something that allows me to actually improve myself. If I feel like a certain activity is a waste of my time, I need to be able to just say no.

4) Be less of an asshole. I'm becoming more and more aware of the fact that, under the guise of sarcasm and humor, I am often kind of a dick. To "get real" about it, I think it all just stems from a whole lot of insecurity and a need to be the "funny guy", which leads me to just say whatever shitty thing pops into my head at the moment. I mean, I don't want to compromise my sense of humor, and there are right places and times to bust balls and joke around. I just need to be more thoughtful about the things I say, why I say them, and what effect they're going to have on others.

All of these items can be summed up fairly simply, actually:

BE MORE THOUGHTFUL.

I have a lot more than seven...

2008-12-29T15:19:00.000-08:00

Reasons why Christina is lame:

1) She didn't appreciate my original layout colors.
2) She made me change them, without attempting to figure out how to do it herself or even providing any hints as to what colors she would prefer.
3) She complained about the changes I made.
4) She didn't get it when I ironically changed them to very ugly colors, reminiscent of a troll's vomit after an intense watermelon-eating contest... from the 80's...
5) She ditched me today so she could hang out with her parents in the hospital or something? I don't know, I wasn't really listening.
6) In reading the past few posts, I realize she's turned this blog into more of a wall-to-wall between the two of us, instead of actually posting anything interesting.
7) She'll probably read this list, take it seriously, and go "HOW RUDE" like Michelle Tanner from Full House.

Reasons why Christina is not lame:
1) Actually, that last one is pretty awesome.
2) She has good taste in Japanese horror movies.
3) We're gullies for life! Dinner tonight?

at 6:39 in the morn

2008-12-25T06:24:00.000-08:00

so listen

I've officially become nocturnal. off fish alley knock turn all. i seem to sleep from 7 am to 4 pm or so. this likely is not quite healthy.

i've been watching a lot of CHTV videos, and reading these people's blogs. i was thinking, trying to understand why i like watching them so much, and i figured it out. believe it or not, it has a lot to do with Weezer and Barack Obama.

You might be confused. Allow me to explain.

What I like about these CollegeHumor folks, besides the simple fact that their stuff is funny, is that they're all regular Joes. It almost seems like it's a bunch of my friends making videos. I see them out of character, I can read their blogs, and I can connect with them outside of just their work. It makes the audience member feel like one of them, like part of their community.

Weezer fandom is very similar. The reason why I got so into it, and why a lot of people are into it, is because the band is so open to fans. They used to actually post on the message boards regularly, and would interact with fans all the time. They would secretly release all these demos from the past -- literally hundreds of songs that were never heard on studio recordings. When you were a Weezer fan, you actually had a whole community that you were intimately connected to, with its own culture, customs, and even vocabulary.

Barack Obama got the overwhelming level of support that he did because he tried to run a "grassroots" campaign. Really what that means is making the individuals take ownership over a political campaign/cause... which is only possible by making them feel like they have both agency and A CONNECTION to the cause. After the election, a lot of people exclaimed that "WE DID IT"... "WE", not "HE"...

Okay I might be rambling a little bit because I am getting fairly tired at this point... But the point is that my little revelation is that the secret to creating work that really touches people is to be as transparent and collaborative as possible. When fans feel like they're a member of a community (and not just a consumer of a product, or a polling statistic), that's when they'll really throw their support behind whatever it is you're trying to do. This can apply to bands, comedians, politicians... and pretty much anything else in LIFE.

I'm sure this is actually a fairly basic idea taught in a lot of, you know, bullshit business courses or whatever, but I've just never thought of it framed in quite that way and IT WAS INTERESTING TO ME OKAY? SHUT UP I HATE YOU!

goodnight

THE GREATEST VIDEO IN THE WORLD

2008-12-23T01:09:00.001-08:00

IN CASE YOU WERE WONDERING

2008-12-02T15:43:00.000-08:00

These are all things that I would think about before getting down on one knee and popping the question. I present to you:

John's Life Partner Litmus Tests (non-physical appearance-related things only):

1) Must do something creative and interesting with her "free time"... Must not just sit around watching T.V. and reading gossip blogs all day. Bonus points if she can do something I can't do at all (illustrate, dance).

2) Music: Must like at least one or two acts that are kind of strange (Animal Collective, The Flaming Lips, The Unicorns). Might seem unimportant, but I think music taste actually says a lot about a person.

3) Must not think any of the following people are funny: Dane Cook, Carlos Mencia, Carrot Top, Dat Phan, Ant, Larry the Cable Guy, Rosie O'Donnell.

4) Must enjoy watching bad movies on purpose every once in a while.

5) Must never roll eyes and sigh at "That's what she said" jokes. Must make her own occasionally.

6) Must sometimes enjoy walking around the city doing nothing in particular.

7) Must not sincerely believe that dinosaurs and humans coexisted. Also must not believe that the earth is less than 10,000 years old.

8) Must actually tell me directly when shit is bothering her instead of doing the stupid passive-aggressive things that 99% of all girls do. In general, should hate drama and mind games as much as I do.

9) Must be a geek. Sci-Fi, Fantasy, RPGs, computers, comics, video games -- it doesn't really matter what kind.

10) Must eat like a man.

11) Must kiss my boo-boos to make them all better.

Upon this Monday morning

2008-12-01T10:08:00.000-08:00

As my Greyhound bus pulled into Los Angeles at about 10 o'clock last night, I felt fairly contemplative. Being stuck in a bus for 10 hours will do that to a person. Looking around at the city lights hanging high in the sky above me, I couldn't help the feeling that I was returning from a trip and coming home. After three years of living here, this city feels more like home than Home does.

Home changes while I'm gone. Buildings are struck to the ground, rebuilt. Friends become diaspora. Memories of how to get from here to there fade from their place deep within my skin, my muscles, my bones. I'm left with a house that I'm allergic to, a dark ocean, and a park bench. For the first time in a long time, I stood on a hill, in the wind, and actually felt cold. The winds I used to brave with youthful indifference now chill me, affect me. I've become soft, maybe.

Fuck. I don't know.

I'm belatedly thankful for friends.

Here's to friends!

Various assorted knick-knacks, etc.

2008-11-27T06:28:00.000-08:00

I lost two tires on the 280 last night. Long story short: it sucked, big time.

But I'm home now. Or, "home", anyway.

I've apparently continued my trend of waking up way too early. Today I clocked in at 3:30 A.M.

I'm mostly just posting right now out of boredom, because there ain't much to do at home, without a car, at 6:30 in the morning. Also, I have about half an hour left on my laptop battery, and none of the outlets in this house are currently working, for some mysterious reason.

EMOTIONS OF NOW:

- Excitement: To see people I haven't seen in a while (especially my LBF!).
- Concern: About my shitty, shitty car.
- Frustration: I hate this house because I have ridiculous allergies to it. I've gone through an entire box of Kleenex already.
- Regret: About missing Colin's Thanksgiving dinner at USC.
- More excitement: About my new major/minor combo.
- Jealousy: (About something that shall remain a secret).
- Boredom: Yeah.
- Fear: About all the homework I have to do this weekend, and all the studying I'll have to do in the next two weeks or so. About being able to maintain a reasonable GPA despite my poor choice of courses this semester.

So I got a veritable emotion cocktail going on here.

Coming soon: John's list!

Good Morning

2008-11-25T07:19:00.000-08:00

I woke up early this morning, early enough to witness the sunrise. Our apartment has the unique position of not being high enough for a proper view of the Downtown Los Angeles skyline, but being high enough that we can see the tops of those buildings from our balcony. This was a disappointing reality at first, but I've come to appreciate the beauty in the view-that's-not-a-view. There's something poetic, maybe, about seeing only a glimpse of what could be, were we a little bit higher off the ground. There's something about having a view but having to look up, not down, to see it. Or maybe there isn't, and this is all just bullshit. I don't know.

What I do know is that I like the cold, crisp air of morning, before the sun ruins it all with its warmth. I like the calm of a shower, of a small breakfast, of a cup of tea on that poetic balcony. I like the quiet optimism of each slowly passing second, before the speed and stress of a real day dawning.

I need to do this more often.

Behold, my triumphant return...

2008-11-20T17:19:00.000-08:00

All apologies to Christina for neglecting this shit. I say this as if I'm talking to an audience other than Christina herself. Still, whatever.

The reason for my absence is simple: I have nothing to say. Nothing that wouldn't be more at home in a whiny livejournal post, anyway. But looking at the last few posts... I mean, it looks like my counterpart has sunk to writing weird emo poetry, and maybe if I post something she'll stop.

---

Every semester has its theme. Fall 2008 has had been characterized by a complete and total lack of motivation. I'm hoping to stay above a B-average, but I sure am not making it easy for myself.

It's not entirely my fault. In fact, I'm questioning whether it's a bad thing at all. If my goal was to become a doctor or an electrical engineer, college would make a lot of sense. Seeing as all I want to do is write silly little stories and songs, I don't see the point.

Well, the point is that I'm afraid of starving to death. But I do question whether a degree in Anthropology is actually going to make a difference to that end. Even if I decide to continue with Economics, which I no longer want to do... It just doesn't seem like I'd want to do any job where quantitative research ability would be an asset. And the whole "tens of thousands of dollars in debt" thing ain't so hot, either.

Really, what I need to do is drop out and just try living and doing whatever I want. And trust that I'd be able to make ends meet. I've noticed that God, or whatever it is, has a way of making things work out for the best in the end.

There's security in stability, though. And 18-22 year olds of reasonable means are supposed to go to college in our society. So... fuck it. Let's send that tuition money down the drain. Who cares?

If there's one thing college has taught me, it's apathy.

Covers I like better than the originals:

2008-10-29T01:13:00.000-07:00

(in no particular order)

Tally Hall's cover of Biz Markie - Just a Friend

Tally Hall's cover of The Killers - Smile Like You Mean It

Rogue Wave's cover of Buddy Holly - Everyday

Weezer's cover of The Pixies - Velouria

Weezer's cover of The Beatles - If I Fell

I'm sure there's more but this is what occurs to me right now.

Awesome.

X-TREME HAPPENINGS

2008-10-28T13:16:00.000-07:00

An X-TREME thing happened on the way to the lecture hall... I was riding my bike down Trousdale when a guy on a skateboard and a girl on a bike crashed into each other. It was only a couple feet in front of me so I didn't have time to brake.

Instead, I kept riding along and ended up on TOP OF THE SKATEBOARD for a few seconds. Yeah, that's right. I was riding a bike on a skateboard. How freaking X-TREME can you get? I then pedaled off the skateboard and made a perfect landing, and continued riding along as if nothing had happened.

I'm such a bad-ass.

A beginner's guide to gettin' ladies

2008-10-28T09:22:00.000-07:00

I know who you are. You're that guy, sitting there, alone. You're wishing you were gettin' ladies right now. I WILL SHOW YOU HOW.

1) Find a lady. Make sure she is an elegant woman. The kind of classy lady you're trying to get should wear cocktail dresses and gloves at all times. She should cover her mouth when she giggles. If she ever speaks above a whisper, or ever tries to suggest ideas of her own, she is NOT ELEGANT and is probably one of those "feminist" types. Gross.

2) Stare intensely. Classy ladies love nothing more than to be stared at by strange men. It makes them feel thin, and special. If she notices you, and then looks creeped out, fear not. She's simply playing hard-to-get. Stare with greater intensity. If possible, gather a group of friends and stare at her together. She will appreciate the lengths you have gone to make her feel special.

3) Be completely silent. Nothing you say will ever impress ANYONE. Therefore, you should walk up to the woman you are trying to get and say nothing. Continue staring.

4) Do a magic trick. If there's one thing small children and elegant women have in common, it's their love of simple magic tricks. Always have a deck of cards on your person at all times for this purpose. Remember, SAY NOTHING. The combination of magic and silence will make you seem all the more mysterious.

5) Give her orders. Elegant women love to serve men, so they love receiving orders. But remember, don't speak! Simply point at the things you want her to fetch, cook, clean, or use to put on an impromptu puppet show. She'll get the message... and she'll love your take-charge attitude!

6) Tell her you hate her and her whole family. Congratulations, now you can start speaking. Classy ladies love getting insulted. Make sure to point out everything you hate about her, including but not limited to her face, her outfit, her odor, her GPA, and her Dodge Neon.

7) Seal the deal. Now, you strike. Try something simple, like, "So are you gonna do me or what?" If she says no, after all you've done, she's probably secretly a dude!

Now that you know how to get a lady, go out there and make me proud!

A Brief History of ~

2008-10-27T07:28:00.000-07:00

The ~ was invented by Marcus Tilde, a mad scientist and therefore a pretty cool dude. In 1925, he was on his deathbed. He thought to himself, "I need to preserve my essence in a thing, so that people remember me when I'm gone." It was important to remember him when he was gone because he was just that awesome. He was the life of every party, and made all the ladies laugh and want to hold his hand and buy him stuff. With the help of his assistant dwarf, Paolo, he built an Essence Transfer Machine. At his death, Paolo placed Tilde's corpse into the machine, and turned it on. On the screen flashed but one symbol: ~.

It was enough. It represented everything that made Tilde such a cool dude. The president saw it and was like, "Woah, that thing must have the essence of a cool dude in it, or something?" He declared October 27th National Tilde Day, and made sure that all typewriters had tildes on them from then on.

Isn't that great?~

Welcome

2008-10-26T17:37:00.000-07:00

I'd like to take this moment to welcome you to the Hobo Pajama Party. I know what you're thinking. "John, isn't 'hobo' kind of an outdated, offensive word?" The answer is yes, yes it is. But you know what else is offensive? Being a hobo. Get a job, asshole!

Chuckles and I look forward to sharing our really cool thoughts with you.